I Am the *OVERSEER* of my life.
This means that I am vigilant about over-seeing my emotions as well as my inner and outer life. As blasphemous as this might sound, I am the Bishop of my Soul, the sentinel of my inner world. No matter what I am doing, who I am interacting with, I have constant awareness of how I am feeling at each moment. I witness when I begin to feel anxious or uncomfortable to the slightest degree. I see myself start to hold my breath. I realize when I am not sitting up straight or smiling symmetrically, or whatever my inner or outer body is doing. In this way, I am able to adjust and bring about my total harmony to keep myself always in an internal and external balance. I am deeply and continuously self-aware.
Additionally, I make time every day to more particularly *commune* with my Self. Years ago, I would spend time “praying.” I no longer pray to any outside Being. My experiences now are withIN. This, I call my “communion.” I have recently been given from withIN what I call my *5 Elements Meditation.* I will often engage in this in preparation for my two-way communion experience. My communing, although held all day long, no matter what I am engaged in, is my intimate experience with my inner Self. At this special time though, “we” are private, alone, engaged in holy conversation with each other… only. I am given direction, revelation, comfort, strength. I acknowledge questions, feelings of weakness or concern. I listen; even deeper and clearer than usual.
Here is how I prepare for my communion, which could be considered my “self care.”
If my intestines are in anyway full or moving, I internally cleanse so that my inner organs can be as still and quiet as possible. I lie down on my back, usually on my bed, making sure I’m as comfortable as I can be; spine aligned, muscles relaxed, hair away from my face, clothing loose and non-distracting. I do best if the room is a comfortable temperature and with the air just gently moving. I prefer quiet, but if there is noise or music in the distant background, I put on some nature sounds to drown them out. I particularly enjoy this experience in nature and solitude, while lying on soft grass and under a tree. This, though, is not a common outside experience for me. I am usually on my bed in my bedroom. Now, with my journal and pen handy to write down the direction I know I will receive, I go into my *5 Elements Meditation.*
[EARTH] I imagine seeing that my feet and lower torso are rooted into and a part of the planet. I feel secure, a part of the global whole. Wanted.
[WIND] My intestines and lungs are filled with nothing but pure air. As such, I am a wind instrument, capable of being played by the cosmic breath. I breathe deeply. I am safe. Confident. Comfortable.
[FIRE] My heart feels warm with the love that I receive and I give out to the world. I am loved. I am love. I exist to love.
[WATER] I then think about and feeeeel gratitude for the people, characteristics, experiences… anything and everything, specific and general… that comes to my mind. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! As I do this, water starts to literally pool into the bottom of my mouth. Refreshing and delicious. This, I know, is my “fount of living water,” cleansing, recharging, regenerating.
[SPIRIT] I envision LIGHT filling my mind, my crown, coming into and down from above me, filling my entire body and radiating out into the world. This light is holy Truth that is connecting me with Infinite Wisdom and assisting me to comprehend vast reservoirs of Intelligence as needed. I usually feel tingles of electrical sparks arcing from my spine and quickly radiating out into my limbs and throughout my body. I Know that I am Alive.
I am now wholly a *Pillar of Light,* even more vibrant and aware than usual. I Am Who I Am. I am far more than another human would see as “Kimberly.” I know on a deep level and with ever fiber of my being that I Am a Powerful and Divine Being. I Am a conduit for attracting wisdom to this planet.
I now envision my Divine Self, an eternal, glorious, Being. Initially, I see her, having come to reveal more of Her Self to Me. She is beyond beautiful. She is Pretty. She knows it, but I like to remind her. She knows on a deep and complete level that she is the Ultimate in Creation… because she is an Active Part of All in Existence. As I spend a few moments in rapturous awe of her, we then merge more completely once again. I Am HER. She IS ME. Together, we can do all things.
During our personal and private communion, I often perceive specific ideas or understandings. At times she might just give me a symbol or picture without the full interpretation. She likes to play games with me and sometimes I will hours or even days later receive another part of its clue. I have learned to write these down in my journal, so that I can review and remember, allowing me to hold expectation for Her further revelation. Sometimes she will begin dictating to me a poem or story or post or direction for someone in my life. Often, she will bring back a memory of a recent conversation. At times she will remind me of a feeling that I had perceived yet not yet pondered upon and received its wisdom. As I reflect upon it now, she will open up guidance and often give me direction to take when we are through. My Inner Self loves music. She will often give me a few bars of melody and have me “name that tune.” As I do, I will find a hint or a warm and honoring comment from her. Commonly the tunes she uses I will have not heard for decades and will barely remember ever hearing. These I will write down what I do know and then later do a search for the lyrics to discover her complete message for me.
At times, I have been taken to commune with the “Grand Counsel” of Divine Goddesses. They have showered me with honor and union as I have felt embraced by Their Goodness and Light. These special experiences have helped me to KNOW on an exquisitely deep level that I am never alone and that nothing I have ever gone through or will ever go through is not completely understood by THEM. They have gone before me, accomplishing a myriad of “Impossible” feats. Many will go after me. I will add my strength and experiences to empower and serve them. These extra-special communions are particularly rewarding and strengthening, yet They have constantly assured me that I always carry Them with me in my heart.
As I relate and commune with my Self, She feeds and strengthens me. Together, I Know that We are a dispenser of Intelligence to those who have prepared themselves to receive. I Know that I am far more than “me.” I am We, extending into the Entire “We-ness” of creation. For simplicity sake, I define this “We-ness” as just I, though I Know *I* am so much more. I Am a Self-Generating Power Source that is Master of My Life and capable of handling every situation that I meet, calming every storm that arises, settling any conflicts, bringing peace and clarity to all interactions. As such, I operate as a reminder to others of Who THEY Are, equally Powerful and Divine Beings, each with a unique purpose and gift to offer to collective humanity.
In this way, my “self care” is additionally care for the planet, nature, and each and every particle and person included within it. Oh, I desire to assist and empower all others who Will, to experience this precious and personal “self care” for them selves.
In my pursuit of Real Truth, I have given up everything. Crawling through the “eye of the needle,” I have learned the *mysteries* and am now giving my life to assist YOU to dis-cover Who *YOU* really are, along with your unique gift to offer humanity. As you learn to seek (in the right place and with purified intent), you WILL find treasures of lasting value, along with every promised reward. Together, we will establish a society of humane beings and live life ALIVE, on PURPOSE, and with a sociality unequaled… because we will each BE and view each other as equally and profoundly DIVINE! Please… catch this Hope and Vision and join with me.